The other day I was talking with my students about the Beatitudes. It led to a discussion about what it means to be meek. I answered the best way I could. Then, as is often the case, I went home and thought about it.
I overthink things a lot. It’s one of my many faults. What I’ve found gives me guidance is praying and then coupling God’s guidance with my own life’s experience. I guess you could say it’s a “grace built upon nature” type of thing.
When I read the Gospels, it’s clear to me that Jesus’ teaching changed what had become a “stale” culture by turning it upside down. He took the Mosaic Law and challenged people to write it indelibly on their hearts. He showed mercy to those on the fringes. And the Beatitudes challenge us to do the same. But I’m starting to believe that meekness is a largely misunderstood concept. Meekness is not weakness. It’s not the idea that we stand by and let evil happen by pretending it doesn’t exist. Yet I’ve met far too many people who act like it is.
I work at an all-male Catholic high school. I also attended one. One of the most vital jobs in any such school is that of the dean of discipline. Why? Because boys need strong guidance from men who care enough about them to “get their attention” from time to time. In fact, in my own life, the times I’ve grown the most were when someone challenged me to do so, often unpleasantly .
High school seniors are graduating soon. When I talk to seniors about their four years, you know who many of them say affected them the most positively? The guy who was often the hardest on them. At my school, that’s Mr. Rychcik. I bet they’d say the same about their deans at other schools, too. There’s something to be said about someone who cares enough about us that they’re willing to do the difficult. Kids know truth when they see it. But one might argue it’s as far from “meek” as it could be. Or maybe we’ve gotten “meek” all wrong.
There’s a lot of talk about mercy these days. In fact, our Holy Father has called this the Year of Mercy. Mercy is an important concept, especially in today’s culture. As Christians we are commanded to show it. And how can we not when our Lord has shown us so much? The quandary about mercy, though — as it relates to forgiveness — is that there are two parts to it: the giver and the receiver. God can offer it. But if we don’t recognize we need for it, it means little. Christ was crucified between two criminals, both to whom I’m certain he would have extended mercy. Only one asked.
We can preach mercy all we want to the world. But in a culture where relativism reigns, few see the need for it, because there is no sin. Mercy and love are what draw people to God. We must put on those dispositions — for that’s what it means to be meek. But maybe we also need more Catholics to take stances that seem … well, “un-meek.” I’m not sure Catholic universities giving awards to politicians who champion abortion rights get us there.
I wonder if too many Catholics today have become comfortable with the feel-good side of love while ignoring the type of love that’s universally lacking. Jesus called us to accept the Kingdom as children. What that means to each of us is the million dollar question.
My wife and I are trying to raise our daughters to be compassionate young ladies who care for those in need. But we haven’t stopped looking for Karate schools yet either. The quandary of extremism is that it can lead to a worldview that either fears too much, or puts blinders on to the evils around us. One leads to cynicism — something I’m all too familiar with in my former job; the other leads to a view that we need not do the uncomfortable type of love; just pull out the Jesus sandals and start singing “We Are the World.” I don’t want my daughters to fear the world. But it doesn’t mean they shouldn’t learn how to throw a left hook if they need to.
Let’s get this meek thing right. It takes God’s grace, our nature, and lots of humility. If we can find that balance, I think we’re on the right track.
Paul Stuligross is director of campus ministry at Orchard Lake St. Mary’s Preparatory and is a former police officer
