The following is the first in a series of testimonials from members of “Courage,” the Catholic Church’s apostolate ministering to those with same-sex attraction. For an overview of the Courage program in the Archdiocese of Detroit, as well as its sister apostolate for family and friends, “EnCourage,” see The Michigan Catholic’s Nov. 1 issue.

Detroit — If we really knew our true identities, the “no’s” from the Catholic Church would instead reveal themselves to be joyous “yes’s,” said Dan Mattson, a member of the Courage apostolate, which ministers to Catholics with same-sex attraction.

This applies to all people, not just those who experience same-sex attraction, he added.

“What we’ve forgotten is that all of the commands of God which seem like arbitrary ‘no’s’ are actually leading us to live the way we would naturally choose to live if we truly understood who we are, where our true Home is,” said Mattson, “and what it means to fully embrace being made in the image and likeness of God.”

He said that from this perspective, the Church never actually says “no” — but when it feels like a “no,” that is because we need to better understand our true identities in Christ.

Mattson, who blogs on the topic of same-sex attraction in light of the Catholic Church’s teaching at LetterstoChristopher.wordpress.com, credits Courage for bringing him back to the Catholic Church. After expressing a desire to embrace chastity following a tumultuous phase of life, he attended the annual Courage conference at the invitation of his godparents.

He was so moved by his experience at the conference that he went to confession for the first time in about 30 years, and has become even more strongly devoted to the Catholic faith of his youth.

“I think people miss out on why God allows homosexuality,” said Mattson, explaining that by relying on God through his struggles, he is seeking to become more like Christ. “If I think about this part of my life, which is objectively disordered, as something to celebrate, I’m going to miss out on the gifts that God wants to bring to the redemption of this particular weakness in my life.”

He said it takes a certain amount of humility and honesty to accept this as something disordered, but that trying to view it otherwise “just seems to me to be a sad case of masquerade.”

Courage focuses on helping individuals with same-sex attraction live lives of chastity; something to which all people are called, Mattson emphasized.

“Married men and women are called to chastity the same as single men and women — it just takes a different form,” he said. “Chastity is what allows sexuality to become beautiful, and the most fulfilling way that sexuality can be realized in peoples’ lives.”

He explained that the single and chaste saints were not asexual, which he said is a common misunderstanding of chastity: “No, instead they realized that their sexuality is more a reflection of their maleness or femaleness, and that the pinnacle of a sexual being is union with others, selfless life-giving love, which finds its fulfillment in (physical or spiritual) fatherhood or motherhood.”

Mattson said he is thankful that chastity is a difficult virtue to acquire, and that his difficulties with chastity have helped him realize his “utter and complete” need for God.

“As St. Paul says, ‘when we are weak, we are strong,’ and thank God I have something in my life that makes it perfectly clear that I need God!” he said.