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After all, the romance of courtship finds its proper fulfillment in the lasting state of holy matrimony.
Having been married for 60 years, Betty Scribner, 80, has some thoughts about what makes for a happy marriage.
Her husband, William, passed away last October, several months after they celebrated their 60th wedding anniversary.
William Scribner and the former Betty Reid were married June 21, 1951, at St. Alphonsus Church, Dearborn. They became longtime parishioners of St. Mel Parish, Dearborn Heights, and later St. Damian Parish, Westland.
The priest who married them, Fr. Robert Monticello — now a monsignor — had only been ordained days before, on June 2, and it was his first wedding ceremony. “I told him, ‘I’m the one who’s supposed to be nervous,’” Scribner recalled.
Scribner says flexibility and a willingness to quickly resolve any disputes were key factors in her long and happy marriage. “All in all, I was pretty flexible, and God has given me a great sense of humor,” she said.
“And we never went to bed angry; we always kissed goodnight,” Scribner continued.
Fortunately, her husband was also of an agreeable nature. “He never, ever held a grudge,” she said.
Not that their married life didn’t face its challenges over those six decades. Just two months after they were married, William was drafted into the U.S.Army. “That was very hard on me,” Betty Scribner recalled.
She also said it was difficult when, later in civilian life, he worked an afternoon shift as a supervisor in an automotive plant. Most other men they knew worked days, and the situation presented challenges.
In the early years of their marriage, Scribner said her husband’s paychecks were “so small that I used to be mad that if something were on sale, three for a dollar, I didn’t have a dollar to buy them.”
But, she said, all the money her husband had diverted into the company’s voluntary savings plan paid off for them later in their marriage.
Over the years, the Scribners took many trips together. Besides the opportunity to see far-away destinations, getting away from the humdrum routine of daily life was also good for their marriage.
“If it ever got to the point when we were getting all picky-picky, trips would bring us so close together,” Scribner said.
The Scribners had two daughters, Barbara and Brenda, and Betty Scribner said the loss of Brenda to cancer in 2008 “was probably the hardest thing we ever had to go through — when God throws something like that at you, you just have to try to get through it.”
Last year was tough, she said, as she watched her husband’s health decline. “I’m so glad that God took him in a way that he didn’t suffer much,” she said.
